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The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed Kindle Edition

by Mystery (Author), Lovedrop (Author), Chris Odom (Author), Format: Kindle Edition

4.4 1,598 ratings

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"One of the most admired men in the world of seduction" (The New York Times) teaches average guys how to approach, attract and begin intimate relationships with beautiful women

For every man who always wondered why some guys have all the luck, Mystery, considered by many to be the world's greatest pickup artist, finally reveals his secrets for finding and forming relationships with some of the world's most beautiful women. Mystery gained mainstream attention for his role in Neil Strauss's New York Times bestselling exposé, The Game. Now he has written the definitive handbook on the art of the pickup.

He developed his unique method over years of observing social dynamics and interacting with women in clubs to learn how to overcome the guard shield that many women use to deflect come-ons from "average frustrated chumps."

The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed shares tips such as:

*Give more attention to her less attractive friend at first, so your target will get jealous and try to win your attention.
*Always approach a target within 3 seconds of noticing her. If a woman senses your hesitation, her perception of your value will be lower.
*Don't be picky. Approach as many groups of people in a bar as you can and entertain them with fun conversation. As you move about the room, positive perception of you will grow. Now it's easy to meet anyone you want.
*Smile. Guys who don't get laid, don't smile.

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252 pages
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English
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St. Martin's Press
Publication date

February 6, 2007
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1644 KB
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Never at risk of being called humble, Mystery (aka Erik von Markovik), heralded as one of the best pick-up artists in the country, has created a science of seduction. His meticulously researched system, the "Mystery Method," offers advice to men of every ilk, along with complex charts, social science jargon (e.g., Dynamic Social Homostasis and DHV—Demonstrations of Higher Value) and potty humor Mystery comes off as forceful, provocative and excessively arrogant, but one thing is clear: he's good at what he does. You'll laugh, you'll scoff, but in the end, you'll probably learn something. (Feb.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

“Meticulously researched ... You'll laugh ... but in the end, you'll probably learn something.” ―Publishers Weekly

“Von Markovik knows what he's talking about.” ―Library Journal

About the Author

Audie Award finalist Alan Sklar has narrated nearly two hundred audiobooks and has won several AudioFile Earphones Awards.

Mystery, the star of VH1's The Pickup Artist, has built a successful business teaching his method of picking up women around the world.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

The Mystery Method

How to Get Beautiful Women Into BedBy

St. Martin's Press

ISBN: 9780312360115
Chapter One The Mystery Behind Casanova If teachers and parents taught subjects in their order of importance to the males receiving their “wisdom,” history lessons wouldn’t invoke Greek philosophers and ancient mystics, presidents and kings, warriors and generals. They would focus instead on Casanova, history’s most accomplished and successful lover. He was born in Venice, Italy, in 1725, and he died in 1798, numbers that are less important than these: By his own account, over those seventy-three years, Casanova enjoyed erotic liaisons with 122 women during his travels across Europe as a clergyman, soldier, violinist, and magician. In eighteenth-century France, nobody had more game. But Casanova didn’t seduce indiscriminately. He set his sights high and took to bed only those women whose value made them worthy of pickup. These were the perfect 10s and near 10s of their day: what a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model might have looked like at one of Mozart’s recitals, floating from one social set to the next, glancing discreetly over a ruffled fan that obscured a plunging bustline, her hairdo intricately sculpted three feet high. They were women of extreme beauty with the highest social ranking, seemingly off-limits to anyone but royalty. Forget Shakespeare’s sonnets, the Gettysburg Address, and War and Peace—if Casanova had left behind not just an autobiography (itself wildly popular to this day) but a step-by-step, detailed how-to guide to his sexual conquests, it would rank as the most sought-after text in history, next to Holy Scriptures. What wouldn’t you or any man give to learn the secret of seducing beautiful women? Just look at the timeless appeal of the Kama Sutra—and then imagine a guide not to exotic sexual positions but to getting beautiful women attracted to you in the first place. My name is Mystery, and I have written just such a guide, now in your hands. As the world’s premier pickup artist, I am the closest thing there is to a modern-day Casanova (although I have already “outnumbered” him). Like my predecessor, I absolutely adore women. In fact, I fall in love with all of them. But that doesn’t make me unique. What makes me unique is that because of the pickup techniques I have mastered, my love doesn’t go unrequited. And I’m here to show you how to achieve the same success. The Algorithm for Getting Women Not only were the Venusian arts (the arts of love) excluded from your curriculum—but they’re probably the only discipline teachers didn’t try to cram into your brain as you passed from childhood through adolescence and then into adulthood. Let’s face it, when you studied algebra at school, the only numbers you really cared about were the measurements of the girl in the tight sweater and the digits you needed to get her on the phone. Those numbers added up to something worth getting your hands on. Enter the Mystery Method. If someone doesn’t have health and wants to get it, he or she will need to adopt an algorithm on how to do that—perhaps a new diet and workout regimen. If someone doesn’t have wealth and wants to get it, he or she will need to adopt an algorithm for wealth building—perhaps a new investment portfolio. Similarly, in relationships, if someone doesn’t have success and wants to get it, he or she will need to adopt the algorithm for success there. I invented that algorithm. I am your teacher and this is your guidebook to discerning the patterns in dynamic social interactions and then using them to your advantage. This body of knowledge, called the science of social dynamics, has become my life’s work, particularly as it applies to the world of pickup. It is about more than seduction and sexual conquest; it also encompasses making friends with men and women alike. But, make no mistake, it is first and foremost about getting laid more than you could ever have dreamed possible, assuming that’s what you want. And not just laid but, like Casanova, laid by those gorgeous women who have always seemed beyond reach. For him, it was members of the aristocracy; for you, I’m talking about the women you see walking runways in stiletto heels, on the arms of pro athletes and celebrities, and in the pages of Playboy and Maxim. You can have them. The Mystery Method can give them to you. Mastering the Science of Courtship The Mystery Method provides a step-by-step game plan that structures “courtship”—which is the quaint, old-fashioned term for the sequence of events that results in guys getting laid—for success. Before me, no one had ever defined courtship as a predetermined structure having several phases. Through years of study and experimentation, I identified a process that begins when you meet a woman who interests you. From there, using a finely calibrated ability to influence (not manipulate; there’s a huge difference), which this book will help you develop, you build attraction with her. This concept is hugely important: Attraction comes before seduction. But attraction, while necessary, isn’t an end in itself. Next, you need to build comfort with this woman you’ve targeted. (As you’ll find out, both are equally necessary for reaching the end-game: sex.) As I teach “courtship,” the process of building attraction and comfort will probably transpire over several venues—say, a bar and a restaurant—en route to the final venue, which will likely be your bed, or a hotel room’s. That won’t happen, however, until you create arousal at the end of the comfort-building stage and then begin a sexual relationship by seducing her. That’s what the Mystery Method does. What it is, is an advanced algorithm thirteen years in the making. I created it through years of trial and error, because I had to. When I was starting out there was no guidebook like the one you have now. I didn’t have the luxury of buying a book like this, or attending a seminar, or Googling “pickup artist” online. Armed with nothing but ignorance and desire, I went out into “the field,” because that’s where the girls were. Step-by-step, I learned first how to “open.” Once I learned how to open, I also discovered empirically that in public settings girls of beauty are seldom, if ever, alone. So then I had to get good at opening an entire group, and so on, until my system for seducing women became comprehensive, battle-tested, and turnkey. Honestly, had I read a guidebook like this when I was starting out, I would have saved myself about seven years of pain and confusion. Since its conception, the Mystery Method has been modified by some of my closest friends, most of whom were former students of mine who got caught up to speed on my techniques and became great pickup artists in their own right. Just as my students have learned their craft from me, I have in turn learned much from them, and the insights they gained in the field have improved my own methodology. Like any system of self-improvement and personal transformation, the Mystery Method is constantly being improved. It will always be a work in progress because the people using it are constantly changing as well. To keep it up-to-date with the latest empirical data available, I make systematic improvements every six months, without fail. You can keep up with our refinements and new discoveries at www.mysterymethod.com. Unlock the Secret to Attracting Beautiful Women If you follow the Mystery Method, as outlined in this book, you literally should be able to seduce any woman you meet—no matter how attractive she is and no matter how far out of reach she seems—within four to ten hours, with the average seduction occurring within seven, leading to what I call the Seven-Hour Rule. (Bear in mind that those seven hours aren’t necessarily continuous, although they can be. As I noted, usually taking courtship to seduction requires venue changes, which have to be accommodated through what are called time bridges. More on those later.) Seducing any woman in seven hours . . . how is this possible? The reason the Mystery Method works, and works so quickly, is that it defines the natural process of courtship, from meeting to sex, that has applied to every love story you’ve ever heard about, or read, or experienced. It reflects universal truths and the natural course of events, and I’ve backward-engineered it from my own successes. I would go in, “build” a girlfriend, and then think, OK, how did I do that? That’s how I figured out and unraveled the myriad of cognitive models that define courtship. OK, you’re probably thinking, Of course I’d love to build attraction and comfort with a gorgeous woman, but every time I approach one I get shot down before I’ve finished my second or third sentence. Here’s the deal—and it’s one of the most amazing secrets of the Mystery Method because it is so counterintuitive, running contrary to everything you’ve believed about attracting beautiful women your entire life. In order for you to be permitted the audience of a beautiful woman to attempt to attract her, you must first disqualify yourself from being considered a potential suitor by her. If you don’t do that, she will assume by your approach alone that you’re after her. And if you’re after her, she knows that you perceive her as having high value. And if her value is high, the odds are that it’s higher than yours. In other words, you will have low value, and you will be penalized, not only just for approaching her but also for being nice. At that point, you’ve already telegraphed that you’re not worth it. I will teach you how to avoid this trap using the Mystery Method. Instead of stumbling into a group of women blindly and immediately qualifying yourself as a potential suitor, you will learn how to win them over during those first few minutes, allowing you to demonstrate a higher value to them. The book will of course give you chapter and verse on demonstrating a higher value, from “peacocking” (dressing outlandishly) and preselecting (displaying other women to the “target,” which often builds a jealousy plotline into your seduction), to social proof (showing that others in her set value you highly), to “negging” (making subtle-yet-negative statements that put your target off-guard and make her question her own value, increasing yours on a relative basis). There is even a special section on demonstrating higher value to, and then picking up, “hired guns,” a term describing anyone who is hired for her beauty, including exotic dancers, bartenders, go-go dancers, hostesses, and models. In fact, throughout the entire book I fill in the meeting-to-sex structure of courtship with Venusian arts gambits, so that you can complete the objectives of each phase. But I go further still by adding a third layer to the book. I show you how to personalize your game, helping you create and then convey an identity whose stereotype works for you to presume higher value. The last thing I want to do is turn you into a generic cookie-cutter pickup artist. Using the Mystery Method, I picked up a supermodel as she sat with seven coworkers at a popular Hollywood sushi bar. While they paid the bill, I had only two or three minutes to interact. I immediately initiated a chat with her, disqualified myself from being considered a potential suitor, and systematically demonstrated my value to her, while not telegraphing interest. When my target’s group left, she decided to hang by the bar with two friends. To develop social proof, I opened an adjacent four-set—two girls, two guys—and disarmed the guys, who soon departed. With two women on my arms, I re-engaged my target, now in a three-set. Introducing my wing into the set to befriend and occupy my target’s friends for a moment, I moved her into isolation, escalated kino, and voila! I got my first supermodel. Once you’ve mastered the techniques I outline here, you too can perform equally spectacular seductions! Building a Mystery I can do it for you because I’ve done it for myself. Believe it or not, when I was younger, I was actually an extremely shy person. No wonder I became fascinated by magic. I loved hiding behind it; it afforded me a social mask, protecting me in my interactions with people. Magic provided me with prescripted routines packing an emotional punch. The turning point for me came in my late teens, when I traveled to Florida to perform a magic show on a cruise ship. Before I could even get scheduled on the ship, I found myself making more money performing intimate and interactive illusion in restaurants and lounges. In fact, I did so well in the restaurants that I never bothered to make it on board. More important, the experience taught me a series of essential concepts. For example, in that setting, you shouldn’t just walk up to a table of strangers and say, “Uh, hi. Would you like to see some magic?” The easiest thing for someone to say in that situation is no. So I had to come up with a series of techniques for being cool—that way, they would actually want me to be there. Then I had to internalize these rules that I developed, so that over repeated days of work I’d get better and better at it. Eventually, I found myself in possession of a really cool social skill set. Then I came to realize that I could remove the magic from those routines and they would still pack a punch. I got good at developing stories and plotlines with which I could captivate a group, and that became the basis of forming routines and using canned material. I then started teaching these skills to my friends. They mastered them, and so can you. If you’re thinking, Yeah, that worked for you, but it will never work for me; I’m a geek, don’t worry. I was a geek, too. The truth is, generally speaking, geeks are intelligent individuals who simply haven’t yet applied that intelligence to social scenarios; hence, they appear deficient in that area. Making matters worse, the society around us, at first glance, appears very chaotic. But when you look at all other human beings as beautiful, elegant biological machines embedded with sophisticated behavioral systems designed to align with others to maximize their chances for survival and replication, the task of understanding humanity and your place in it becomes surmountable. Not only was I myself a geek, but I’ve also taught the Mystery Method to other geeks! And you know what? They’re not geeks anymore, and neither will you be. With me as your friend and guide, you’ll start uploading Venusian arts programming into your behavioral system and then practice and internalize it so you won’t have to think about picking up. It will just happen naturally when the moment arises. By reading this book, all you’re doing is hanging out with a guy who figured it out. I figured it out. I know how. I know for a fact that I know how because I have a girlfriend. Along those same lines, this book also will work wonders for you if your relations with women have been hindered by your perception, true or not, that you’re physically unattractive. In fact, you have less to worry about than the geek, because the “attraction circuits” of women are calibrated to find a man attractive not measured primarily by handsomeness or physique but rather by social value. It’s not as much about looks as it is about conveying that you are the “tribal leader.” Allow me to explain. A woman’s job is to survive and replicate. To achieve those ends, she will align herself with anyone who can assist her in that survival and replication. The more S-and-R value the person has, the merrier. So the powerful leader of a tribe might be old, fat, and bald, but aligning with him will greatly improve her chances of survival and replication because of his power to protect her. To use a more modern-day analogy, how many times have you seen a gorgeous woman with a brick-house body on the arm of an older, hunched-over man who looks like he would need a forklift to get it up? You and I both know that guy owns a nightclub or some apartment buildings. He sure as hell isn’t working at a car wash. So if you aren’t the easiest guy on the eyes, I will show you how to become the “tribal leader” within your own family, community, and circle of friends. Even if it takes you several years to become one . . . that’s what you have to be. If you’re not a geek and you’re not physically unattractive, but you fail in your efforts to seduce women because you’re shy, don’t worry. I, too, was shy. One of the great things about the Mystery Method is that, initially at least, you can hide behind stock routines and canned material, using them as tools for social dynamic interaction and the enjoyment of performing lighthearted social experiments. In this way, I will show you how to educate yourself and attain social intelligence. Being shy just means that you’re scared to interact with other people. If you feel lonely, if you feel bad, those emotions exist for a purpose: to motivate you to improve your chances of survival and replication. You do that by aligning with other human beings who have S-and-R value. You’re designed for social dynamic interaction; your brain is hardwired for you to be a social robot. Rooted in evolutionary behavioral psychology, the Mystery Method will help you align with your brain’s design and work to break free of your shyness, improving your life dramatically. Like I said, I was very shy as a kid. Yet step-by-step, through countless approaches, I met more people and I started discovering the patterns of interaction—that there is a natural sequence of events that takes place in every such interaction. The more I learned about it, the more prepared I was, the less fear I had. That’s what this book does: It prepares you to improve your life when you’re ready, in a way and at a pace that’s comfortable for and unique to you. That brings me, full circle, to my final point of this chapter: Why do I choose Casanova for my role model, as opposed to, say, Don Juan? After all, Don Juan is famous (or notorious, depending on your perspective) for having slept with thousands of women, while Casanova only had 122, by his own account. But the reason that I favor Casanova and he is still today so popular—his very name is now synonymous with seduction—is because he was picky. Casanova, on the one hand, had really nice, classy women. The fictional character Don Juan, on the other hand, was more like the literary equivalent of Wilt Chamberlain—he basically screwed anything that moved. So given the choice, I’ve had fewer women than I could have had because I say no far more than I say yes. On that note, turn the page and join me as we begin on your journey to pickup mastery. Copyright © 2007 by Mystery Method Corporation. Foreword copyright © 2007 by Neil Strauss. All rights reserved.

Continues...
Excerpted from The Mystery Method by Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Product details

ASIN ‏ : ‎ B000Q9ENWQ
Publisher ‏ : ‎ St. Martin's Press; First edition (February 6, 2007)
Publication date ‏ : ‎ February 6, 2007
Language ‏ : ‎ English
File size ‏ : ‎ 1644 KB
Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Print length ‏ : ‎ 252 pages

Best Sellers Rank: #230,747 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #62 in Mate Seeking (Books)
- #239 in Sexuality (Kindle Store)
- #252 in Interpersonal Relations (Kindle Store)

Customer Reviews:
4.4 1,598 ratings

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Chris Odom
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Chris Odom was the ghostwriter behind the bestselling "The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women into Bed" (2007, St Martins Press).
Now he has paired up with Mystery again for a new book of the continuing adventures and teachings of the world's most famous pickup artist. "The Pickup Artist: The New and Improved Art of Seduction" is being published by Villard Books and will be available in bookstores January 2010.
Speaking about the book, Chris said,
"[The Pickup Artist] benefited, I think, from the many in-depth interviews that I conducted, and impromptu recordings -- even recordings of live pickups! I wanted to capture all the new ideas and teachings as well as the stories. And I did a lot of intensive research into Mystery's original online writings that are legendary in the seduction community. So because of this, much more than the old book, I was able to capture his essence and his voice. Also with the characters around him, to bring them to life. And this book is also very dense with knowledge..."
Chris is also the author of Revelation (2008, Venusian Arts). He lives in Los Angeles with his girlfriend.
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Mystery
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Mystery is the alter-ego of entertainer Erik von Markovik, the star of VH1's The Pickup Artist and the world's foremost expert in the art and science of social dynamics.
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Erik Von Markovik
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Customers find the book insightful, useful, and great for learning about social dynamics. They describe it as a great, well-written, and brilliant read. Readers also mention that the humor is good, fun, and arouses feelings of elation, zeal, and sympathy.

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78 customers mention "Information quality"74 positive4 negative

Customers find the book insightful, useful, and great for learning about social dynamics. They say it's the best and most direct teaching tool they have encountered. Readers also mention the book is well-researched and a good book for someone with social problems.

"...I think it's a great framework for dating and I'd recommend it to *anyone* - even a committed Christian with no intention of sleeping with a girl..." Read more

"...It's a gateway into understanding, and manipulating, the fundamentals of human interaction. It's also a lifestyle and perspective changing book...." Read more

"...I'm getting into NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) It's great for fixing your mindset, influencing people, and transfers well into PUA as much of..." Read more

"...He is a man of depth and vision which was a major reason why The Game was worth perusing...." Read more

66 customers mention "Readability"55 positive11 negative

Customers find the book well-written, brilliant, and to the point. They also say it's amusing and easily read.

"...The fact is that they all work, they can all be good, and they can all get you into bed with the type of women you desire...." Read more

"An excellent book...." Read more

"...This is turn makes it a light and quick read...." Read more

"...Even though a lot of information is "antiquated," it's still a very good book for someone who's just starting to really want to break into the art..." Read more

6 customers mention "Humor"6 positive0 negative

Customers find the book humorous, saying it's a good laugh and fun. They also say it arouses feelings of elation, zeal, and sympathy.

"...He arouses feelings within us of elation, zeal, and sympathy...." Read more

"...I found this book to be very funny! I was laughing a lot while reading it...." Read more

"...This book is a good laugh as a very mini autobiography, there are some cool experiences you read, but don't turn it into gospel...." Read more

"...It's a lot of fun when you get the hang of it. Like following a simple protocol.The hardest part is mustering past the "openers"." Read more

6 customers mention "Value for money"6 positive0 negative

Customers find the book worth every penny.

"...Incredible book for the price.One last thing----this book is not about long-term relationships or marriage...." Read more

"...(this alone is worth the price of the book)...." Read more

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Sachmo

An Awesome Book that Systematizes Dating. Not predatory or endorsing 'evil' techniques like its idiotic critics contend.

Reviewed in the United States on November 20, 2014

Verified Purchase

There are a lot of negative reviews about this book, and for a while I avoided buying it because of these. I regret not reading this book sooner.

Let me address each one...

1) Methods outlined in this book are about lying your way into bed or are predatory...

Uh, What? I think people that argue this seriously have not read the book. The 'mystery method' attempts to systematize dating. Being a geek, and writing a book for geeks - he breaks down the steps into (roughly, this is off memory):

A1 - Open
A2 - Female to Male Interest
A3 - Male to Female Interest
C1 - Conversation
C2 - Connection
C3 - Initimacy
S1 - Foreplay
S2 - LMR
S3 - Sex

He argues that dating can be broken down into a repeatable process. I don't think this is predatory or weird. If you study Sales - pretty much all successful sales people follow a process. Contrary to popular belief, Sales isn't a grimy sleazy job - it's a real job to find solution to fit a buyers problem, and in the real world, in industry, any real companies will systematize it into a process.

Well guess what, in dating you are to some extent a salesman. And you are selling yourself. Just like in the business world, not everyone is a suitable customer. But you won't just find that out by telepathy. You need to introduce yourself first, and see if there is attraction and comfort. I do not think it's predatory or sleazy or weird in any way to break this down into a repeatable process.

I think some people don't like the idea of a memorized opener. I personally use what are called 'situational openers' or make a general comment based on the environment at hand when I walk up to meet someone. But I really don't see how it's a big deal if you need a 'prop' to introduce yourself. This isn't lying or mis-representing yourself. It's more like have an interesting line prepared to start a conversation. Guess what, people do this every day in the business world, and it's perfectly acceptable, and makes sense in the context of selling products. I don't view a person selling industrial microscopes as sleazy when he 'opens' with a line... It doesn't make him a liar. It's a prop used to start a conversation.

Furthermore, he states several times in the book that he does NOT advocate lying, and that during the comfort building stages its important to be yourself and make a real connection with the other person. Finally, I don't think that sex is an evil goal. Most people establish physical intimacy at some point early on in their relationship. If you don't want to rush the sex part, then modify the process he's laid out and take it slower. He's presenting what he personally does, and I think it's totally fine that some people are ready and willing to have sex after a few dates, or after a long night out. I know many people like this who are honest people. You have to take the process and adapt it to your own needs.

2) The method doesn't work and is snake oil

I don't really agree with this either. I would say that about 90% of this book is tactical advice devoted toward the A1-A3 phases of opening and having that initial conversation. I watched some vids of the VH1 show after reading the book, and you can literally see him do everything he says and watch it work.

The issue is, he has a *ton* of practice walking up to very attractive woman like its nothing and opening a conversation. Like 4 - 5 nights a week for many years. So he makes it look very, very easy. And in the book, I don't think he fully realizes how hard this is to do, especially when there are groups of people together. So basically I think he actually presents a lot of complex ways to 'open' conversations with people in groups. It gets especially complicated when he suggests merging groups at a bar or club.

I would consider that stuff super advanced. But stick with the basics. I do think it's good advice that when you first walk in and see someone you'd like to talk to, to take about 3 seconds to drum up the chutzpah and just dive in. I also think it's reasonable if you're talking to a group to win over the girl's friends, and then chat with the girl.

And he's completely right that once everyone is comfortable with you and you know the girl is attracted, pull her to a quiet corner of the bar (C1) and have a private conversation to establish more rapport.

Just like with Sales, you're not going to miraculously land your very first sale. In the business world, people cold call scores, if not hundreds of clients, to land just one sale. When you are first starting out, you need to have this kind of mentality and put in the numbers and introduce yourself to a lot of people.

It doesn't make you sleazy. If you personally don't have any standards and are willing to sleep with just anything then sure, you are a dirtbag. But if you are genuinely looking for a connection and you have to introduce yourself to god forbid a dozen women before you can really strike up a conversation and get a phone number, so what?

I think most of the people that complain are simply not putting in the numbers. Again, in a sales position, people will make 20-50 cold calls, do 10 follows up, and try to close 1 client in a single day. I'm not suggesting you devote your life to just gaming women, but you got to put in the numbers.

__________

Some other general comments...

Women do not get this book at all and think it's sleazy because its a highly rational approach to dating, and makes sense. Also because they never have to do outbound approaches.

Again, my best analogy here is sales.

In sales you basically have 4 types of sales people. Outbound Lead Qualification, Inbound Lead Qualification, Closers, Account Managers.

For 95% of guys (unless you are a famous actor or something) you are going to be practicing outbound lead qual. You need to put in the numbers and open up a lot of women. If you don't like night clubs / bars, so what? Then adapt the method to meeting people in book stores. Or for online dating. But the basic *process* makes sense. You need to open a lot of women (A1-A3), qualify if they are a potential match for what you are looking for (C1 - C3), and close (S1 - S3).

The reason women don't get this book is for most moderately attractive women, they've never really had to put themselves out there and walk up to a guy in a public place. From the time they are 16 to their late twenties, they get approached every day by interested guys - so they experience Inbound Sales - and they don't have to expend as much effort to generate these prospects. For better or worse guys do. And believe me, women get just as strategic about this stuff and share texts and such to all their friends and figure out their next actions in advance. They may not lay it out in a process, but generally speaking the average woman has probably had more practice than the average guy - simply because they are always being approached.

A quick note about "Negs". Negs are not put downs - and if you actually read the book you would understand this. A lot of very attractive woman in a public setting will sometimes act aloof or like they are somehow 'better than you' for no other reason than the fact that they know they are physically good looking. If you disagree or don't know what I'm talking about, then I suggest you get out more. The Neg is basically a way to overtly demonstrate to the woman that you don't hold her on a pedestal or kiss her butt just because she's beautiful. It's a way to say, I don't really care that you're pretty, you're still a human like myself, and our interaction will be as equals. So starting off a conversation, and correctly pointing out (maybe as a joke, if it's true) that she's got an eye booger is an example of a "neg". Most guys would be too intimidated to point this out. The neg philosophy is basically, when you interact, make it clear you don't see her on a pedestal. Again, if you actually watch the videos of Mystery interacting with women, this is all he's doing. He's not insulting them or trying to attack their self esteem like many people argue here.

Do you need this book to meet a girl or get laid? No, clearly not. But I do think it's a great framework to think about outbound approaches to woman and dating as a process. People that are more intuitive or thinking (Myers - Briggs) that struggle to understand dating dynamics would appreciate this book greatly. And in reality I think 90% of guys could benefit from reading this book.

Here are my real criticisms though of the book.

1) 90% of this book is geared towards openers, and even of this material, most of it is way too advanced for the average person. Mystery also suggests going out to night clubs and having these 4 - 10 hour nights out that ideally result in laying the girl.

Most guys don't necessarily want this. First because it's simply not compatible with a working person's lifestyle to go out 4 nights a week and stay out till 5 am, and second because realistically, most girls will give out their phone number at best. So I think Mystery gets too focused on going for the same night lay, when most guys want a phone number and a date with a high quality girl.

2) There's almost no discussion of actually going on dates Bang - by Roosh - does a way better job of going through 'middle game' or C1-C3 as Mystery calls it.

3) Although Mystery does state this, I think it would be even better if he had approach statistics to show the reality, but dating really is a numbers game early on.

There's actually a great Christian Dating book called - How to Get a Date Worth Keeping - by Dr. Cloud - who's written a number of Christian Dating books by the way.

What's so interesting about it, is how similar their advice is. Cloud's book - approach a lot of women (or men) - he advises at least 5 / wk. Focus on just dating early on, don't try to get exclusive too early. Even the overall internal frame to have is very similarly presented between Cloud's book and Mystery's. Clearly Cloud doesn't advocate going for sex so early, but that's a personal choice.

I think this book polarizes people because they choose to see something that's either there or not there based upon the fact that Mystery is a self proclaimed 'pickup artist' and it strikes a chord with people either in a very positive or very negative way.

Get past all of that, and actually read the book for what it is. I think it's a great framework for dating and I'd recommend it to *anyone* - even a committed Christian with no intention of sleeping with a girl until marriage, just for the systematic process he presents for dating in general.

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Clarence Oliver

It Works But...

Reviewed in the United States on January 10, 2011

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So does so much else. Look, I don't know what guy is coming to this book. I know I have a sister in college who is single and I'd prefer some guy picking her up with this method, than some of the lame things she's told me guys have tried to do. One guy sent her an email, "Can you handle me?" Really, men need some help in the proper way to capture a woman's attention and interest. As for me, I've been studying and studying the PUA's. Frankly, I find Logan Edwards two books, Secrets of the A Game and The Art of the Approach to be the most helpful in published PUA material, along with obviously The Game, and several books on influence and persuasion, including a few on covert hypnosis.

As the months have passed as I've started to read and study this material and started to use it in the real world. I've come to the conclusion that you also have to look at your own personality. I am not someone that likes to dress up stupidly (I like to dress up most of the time in dark colors, usually suede and jeans and dress pants), I don't like clubs, and I don't mind not hitting on a girl if there's none that interest me. I agree with Mystery's fundamental reasoning and I believe you should practice, go out there, and work the magic. This book is great for opening sets. But when a woman's alone, I believe your better off with a more direct approach, having to not win over anyone except the woman. And if you don't want to bother opening a set, there's always the approach of, "Can I borrow your friend for two seconds (in a psychological study, 85% of people do not feel threatened by a time restraint of seconds)," express your attraction, or your interest in her. Tell her you'd like to keep talking to her, hand her your phone, and tell her to give you her number. This book is very much oriented to opening up groups of people, something that you don't see a lot of in bookstores, cafes, stores, and on the street (my hunting ground). It says that the mystery method works in the real world away from the club scene, and I've tried a few techniques and it certainly does, so I wouldn't consider it waste if you, like me, don't enjoy the club atmosphere.

Like the stock market, where you have technical analysis and fundamental analysis, a mixture of the two, daytrading, investing, swing trading, and the such, in the pick-up community, you have Speed-Seduction, you have Indirect Game, you have Direct Game, and a mixture of any of them. The fact is that they all work, they can all be good, and they can all get you into bed with the type of women you desire. The first rule of PUA is "Never get invested in any single woman." Look, if you're buying this book with the hope of learning some trick to turn that "Friend" into your girlfriend, it's not here for the most part. There are some simple truths in the world, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," so if you've fallen into the friend zone, break off the relationship, stop being there for her, and stop being her friend. "When you can't have something you'll want it more," for fat people in the world, diets don't work because you try to tell your mind what you can't have which makes you want it more, the same works with women, tell them you don't want them anymore, they want you even more.

The Mystery Method is a superb club-hopping book, that if you go out Friday and Saturday every night, trying out the routine on every girl, every set of girls, in 3 to 6 months you can be getting laid on a regular basis (3 months for sure if you go out 4 mights a week). I weigh 260 pounds, I still have a little acne, I'm 22, and though I wouldn't credit this book with most of my success, I would credit it with something.

The first thing I think guys need to do though is get rid of the limitting beliefs that are holding them back. Unstoppable Confidence by Kent Sayre is a great book to start with, Goodbye-to-Shy by Leil Lowndes is another. In fact, Leil Lowndes has several great books that all guys should check out. The fact is that what the PUA community does for guys is gives them a belief in themselves. When Mystery walks into a club, women come to him, not because he's done something special, but because he walks with the belief that any girl in there can be his. In the end the PUA community is giving guys the ability to fake it until they make it. They're being sent out into the world with routines they're told will help attract women and keep their attention. But the fact is, if you watch The Pick-Up Artist, women listened to those guys right from the beginning, the fact was that they lost their interest because the guys lost faith in themselves. If you believe the routine will work, it will work, and if you need this book to give you some basics, I highly recommend it. But the fact is, if you can gather enough faith in yourself to the point that (to quote Ross Jeffries book, How To Get The Women You Desire Into Bed, a bad book that is great for the confidence building exorcises) You Will Not Make Excuses For Your Desires, You Will Not Make Excuses For Yourself, You Will Walk Through The World Without Apology, And You Will Not Worry About Setbacks Because They Are Learning Experiences, you will get beautiful women attracted to you, because, if you value yourself more than you value them, they will value you too.

That's all it takes to have a high value. You must be the dictator of your own life. Don't let your life become a democracy. Don't seek approval. Don't be a dancing monkey for them. Don't be the lovable loser you see in movies. Be A MAN, America's running short on them. Women say they don't want men, they want gentlemen, but how's being that friend gone for you. Since I've stopped being friends to girls that I want to be with, and ignore them if they don't want to be with me, I've not only increased my self-respect, I've increased the respect that women see in me.

P.S. Jan 19
The more I look at the DHV principle, the more I dislike the books central theme. Mystery is not an Alpha Male, the men that take mystery's class is not an Alpha male, it's why he comes up with this display of higher value. I went through the book again, "Appear willing to walk away." A real Alpha Male is willing to walk away. If you want to be one of those people who wants to be a great gamer, who wants their life to be the game, being the most skilled at seducing women, then I guess this stuff will matter more. But, if you're interested in women. Don't be fake. Learn to be an actual man.

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Hamidreza

Mandatory to read

Reviewed in Canada on January 31, 2024

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I have been knowing about this knowledge in my maternal country iran. It was studied there by a person named Rad. Always i had a dream to read it but unfortunately I couldn’t because of boycotts it was impossible to purchase it over-there. Finally I bought it in canda.and I think it is amazing. It teaches you step by step how to approach a girl and more important be familiar with their mindset.

Matthew

Dating and general life advice via science and method

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 1, 2023

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I would recommend this book to anyone, it has helped me with my confidence and conversational skills no matter who I am talking to. As for the dating part it explains the way it all works and the way women work using science and method. It really is an interesting read

brooklyn

Outdated

Reviewed in Belgium on March 15, 2023

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Some things still work but most of it is outdated but still a oké read but there are better books then this one who are updated.

PelinRad

Super książka, polecam!

Reviewed in Poland on February 6, 2023

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Subhayan Ghosh

Life changing book

Reviewed in India on June 2, 2021

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It focuses on the basics of attraction, comfort, seduction , which is indispensable to learn ,to get abundance of girls in life ,if you read it, your results with women will get 10times better , highly recommend.

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