My wife and I had a rocky relationship for many years. 8 months ago she died from colon cancer. She was diagnosed about a year before that. Our last year was our best year together. I didn't really understand why until I recently read a book -- Gary Chapman's Things I Wish I had Known Before I got Married. The book includes an abridged discussion of his other book The Five Love Languages. Reading this section I had one of the few "Aha" moments of my life. I gained a lot of insight into why our last year had been our best year and how, given this additional wisdom, we could have come closer during our tumultuous marriage. I couldn't recommend it more highly.