Customer Review

Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2017
I'm sure we all can agree that relationships are a core focus for humans. Connection and long lasting relationships are something of grand significance and are a essential and conspicuous priority.
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Subsequently we go over and beyond to ensure they last, sometimes in a negative aspect and other times in a positive one. We tolerate abuse and mistreatment in the name of love with the belief that having someone and something is better than nothing. On the other hand we broadcast unconditional love, and compassion. Further, sometimes it's a friend, family member, or spouse that surprises us with a wrongdoing, incurring damage to us and the relationship.
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"We are hardwired to seek justice and fairness (however we see it), so the need to receive a sincere apology that’s due is deeply felt. We are also imperfect human beings and prone to error and defensiveness, so the challenge of offering a heartfelt apology permeates almost every relationship."
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We try so hard to receive an apology, to make the other aware of our pain and hurt, while at the same time, ironically it is fairly difficult for us to give a genuine apology.
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Sometimes we don't apologize correctly and wonder why our relationships aren't moving forward.
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"It doesn’t matter if the statement you make after the “but” is true—it makes the apology false. It says, in effect, “Given the whole situation, my rudeness (or lateness, or sarcastic tone, or what-have-you) is pretty understandable.”
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When apologizing we need to take into consideration the other persons feelings and hurt, not ours. To truly understand and repair our relationships we need to come from a place of unselfishness.
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"A Good Apology Is Not About You Part of a true apology is staying deeply curious about the hurt person’s experience rather than hijacking it with your own emotionality. A heartfelt apology is not about you. If your intention is to offer a genuine apology, it’s the hurt party’s anger and pain that matters. Save yours for a different conversation."
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“We apologize when we accept responsibility for an offence or grievance and express remorse in a direct, personal and unambiguous manner, offering restitution and promising not to do it again.” A good apology includes the words “I’m sorry” without “ifs,” “buts,” or any manner of undoings, obfuscations, and the like.
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This book provides us with insight on how to properly receive, give and understand apologies.
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