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4.1 out of 5 stars
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Irrationally Yours: On Missing Socks, Pickup Lines, and Other Existential Puzzles

Irrationally Yours: On Missing Socks, Pickup Lines, and Other Existential Puzzles

byDan Ariely
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Top positive review

Positive reviews›
Graham H. Seibert
5.0 out of 5 starsLight, enjoyable reading, but with rich anecdotes that you will remember and share
Reviewed in the United States on May 19, 2015
Dan Ariely is a best-selling author and widely known speaker. Everything he does is entertaining and informative. Stress, however, the entertaining part.

This is advice from an astute student of human nature, a modern "Dear Abby." It is a collection of short essays, more than 60 of them in a book that takes only a couple of hours to read. Each of them is in response to a question, usually posed in the form of a letter from a reader. The material is taken from the "Ask Ariely" column of the Wall Street Journal. Here is a typical question to kick off an essay:

Dear Dan, Why do young people on dates go to loud, crowded places? The noise in these places must prevent the potential couple from talking to each other and it virtually eliminates any possibility that they will get to know each other. So what’s the point AMANDA

His answer is succinct and witty. (1) lots of people don't have much to say in the first place, and noise masks the problem (2) it forces people to sit close together, be more intimate, and (3) whispering in somebody's ear may get them aroused.

The answer is common sense. So is a lot of life. Ariely's talent is in expressing it well, in just a few words, usually in a wry, amusing way.

Ariely's advice is often quite traditional, for this secular age. He takes marriage seriously. He writes touchingly about his own marriage and family, and offers the opinion that yes, marriage is different than mere cohabitation. He and his co-author fully appreciate the secular times in which we live, and yet see value in that which transcends the purely pragmatic.

One of the delights of this book is the cartoons. It is liberally illustrated by William Haefeli, whose work usually appears in the New Yorker. The cartoons are funny and to the point. Ariely is a well-enough established figure that he can draw on contacts to get this kind of thing done.

In summary, this is light reading, a pleasure, but nonetheless rich enough that you will come away enlightened in a few ways, and equally important, with a handful of anecdotes to illustrate points you want to make in conversation or writing.

He offers opinions on just about all of life's issues: marriage, kids, investing, in-laws, dog poop, finding parking, contending with traffic. I include a list of the essay titles to offer the reader an idea of the breadth of his interests.

On Escalation of Commitments
On the Art and Joy of Saying No
On Netflix Dissatisfaction
On Dieting
On Forgotten and Forgiven Loans
On Marriage and Economic Models
On Social Networks and Social Norms
On Kopi Luwak Coffee
On Wedding Ring Woes
On Social Violations and Tattle-Telling
On Variety as a Memory Enhancement
On the Benefits of a Crowded Space
On Hiring a Good (and Free) Advisor
On the Garlic Effect
On Giving to the Poor
On Grandparents and Agendas
On Outsmarting Bathroom Goers
On Gossip as a Social Coordination Me...
On Friends with Benefits
On Ruminating While Running
On the Joy of Getting Things Done
On the Art of Multitasking
On Calling Home
On Toasts and the Ideal Superstition
On Pickup Lines and Compliments
On the Illusion of Labor
On Misery and Shared Humanity
On Flashy Cars
On Dressing Down
On Exploring the Unknown
On Trying Out Relationships
On Divorce and Good Decisions
On Investing in Financial Advisors
On Justice and Sharing Food with Squir...
On Social Life and the Internet
On Expectations in Dating and Hiring

On Learning to Be Better Decision Make...
On the Power of Expectations
On Communicating Safety
On the Perfect Gift
On Eating Lessons and Kids
On Useful Complaining
On Prices and Bidding Frenzy
On Transmission of Stress, and Caring ...
On Luck as a Multiple-Stage Number G...
On Socks and the Psychology of the Su...
On Tithing
On Midlife Clichés
On Cheaters and Alibis
On Breakfast Regrets
On Nighttime Activities
On Playing Parents
On Joint Accounts
On the Bordeaux Battlefield
On Traffic Jam Altruism
On Idle Waiting
On Forcing Decisions with Coins
On Trashy Norms
On Making Smoking Feel Dangerous
On Adventures as Investments
On the Quality and Not the Quantity of I...
On "Helping" People Retire
On the Morality of Correcting Mistakes
On Who We Are and Who We Want to
On the Value of Splitting Checks
On Staplers and Quarters
On Taking Time for Exercise
On Memory
On Books and Audiobooks
On Souls and Pascal's Wager
On Showing Off the Price
On Topics and Teachers
On (the Lack of) Self-Control
On Three Building Blocks of a Balancing...
On Wasting Time Deciding
On Buffet ROI
On Asking the Right Questions
On Doughnuts and the Locus of Free Will
On the Most Optimistic Day of the Year
On Emotional Investing in the Stock Ma...
On Commuting and Adaptation
On Riding Your Dryer to Tucson
On Promotions and the Illusion of Progr...
On Distance from Emotion and Caring
On Predicting Happiness
New Questions and Advice
On the Curse of Knowledge
On Bad Sex
On Mice and Markets
On Letting Loose
On Shrinking and Honesty
On High Heels
On Rules as a Way to Overcome Negati...
On Taxes and Mitzvahs
On Bull Service
On Loss Aversion and Sports Acknowledgments
Read more
21 people found this helpful

Top critical review

Critical reviews›
Ariel Rotman
3.0 out of 5 starsA little too simplistic
Reviewed in the United States on November 24, 2022
The book is not as interesting as his other books.
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286 total ratings, 77 with reviews

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From the United States

Graham H. Seibert
5.0 out of 5 stars Light, enjoyable reading, but with rich anecdotes that you will remember and share
Reviewed in the United States on May 19, 2015
Verified Purchase
Dan Ariely is a best-selling author and widely known speaker. Everything he does is entertaining and informative. Stress, however, the entertaining part.

This is advice from an astute student of human nature, a modern "Dear Abby." It is a collection of short essays, more than 60 of them in a book that takes only a couple of hours to read. Each of them is in response to a question, usually posed in the form of a letter from a reader. The material is taken from the "Ask Ariely" column of the Wall Street Journal. Here is a typical question to kick off an essay:

Dear Dan, Why do young people on dates go to loud, crowded places? The noise in these places must prevent the potential couple from talking to each other and it virtually eliminates any possibility that they will get to know each other. So what’s the point AMANDA

His answer is succinct and witty. (1) lots of people don't have much to say in the first place, and noise masks the problem (2) it forces people to sit close together, be more intimate, and (3) whispering in somebody's ear may get them aroused.

The answer is common sense. So is a lot of life. Ariely's talent is in expressing it well, in just a few words, usually in a wry, amusing way.

Ariely's advice is often quite traditional, for this secular age. He takes marriage seriously. He writes touchingly about his own marriage and family, and offers the opinion that yes, marriage is different than mere cohabitation. He and his co-author fully appreciate the secular times in which we live, and yet see value in that which transcends the purely pragmatic.

One of the delights of this book is the cartoons. It is liberally illustrated by William Haefeli, whose work usually appears in the New Yorker. The cartoons are funny and to the point. Ariely is a well-enough established figure that he can draw on contacts to get this kind of thing done.

In summary, this is light reading, a pleasure, but nonetheless rich enough that you will come away enlightened in a few ways, and equally important, with a handful of anecdotes to illustrate points you want to make in conversation or writing.

He offers opinions on just about all of life's issues: marriage, kids, investing, in-laws, dog poop, finding parking, contending with traffic. I include a list of the essay titles to offer the reader an idea of the breadth of his interests.

On Escalation of Commitments
On the Art and Joy of Saying No
On Netflix Dissatisfaction
On Dieting
On Forgotten and Forgiven Loans
On Marriage and Economic Models
On Social Networks and Social Norms
On Kopi Luwak Coffee
On Wedding Ring Woes
On Social Violations and Tattle-Telling
On Variety as a Memory Enhancement
On the Benefits of a Crowded Space
On Hiring a Good (and Free) Advisor
On the Garlic Effect
On Giving to the Poor
On Grandparents and Agendas
On Outsmarting Bathroom Goers
On Gossip as a Social Coordination Me...
On Friends with Benefits
On Ruminating While Running
On the Joy of Getting Things Done
On the Art of Multitasking
On Calling Home
On Toasts and the Ideal Superstition
On Pickup Lines and Compliments
On the Illusion of Labor
On Misery and Shared Humanity
On Flashy Cars
On Dressing Down
On Exploring the Unknown
On Trying Out Relationships
On Divorce and Good Decisions
On Investing in Financial Advisors
On Justice and Sharing Food with Squir...
On Social Life and the Internet
On Expectations in Dating and Hiring

On Learning to Be Better Decision Make...
On the Power of Expectations
On Communicating Safety
On the Perfect Gift
On Eating Lessons and Kids
On Useful Complaining
On Prices and Bidding Frenzy
On Transmission of Stress, and Caring ...
On Luck as a Multiple-Stage Number G...
On Socks and the Psychology of the Su...
On Tithing
On Midlife Clichés
On Cheaters and Alibis
On Breakfast Regrets
On Nighttime Activities
On Playing Parents
On Joint Accounts
On the Bordeaux Battlefield
On Traffic Jam Altruism
On Idle Waiting
On Forcing Decisions with Coins
On Trashy Norms
On Making Smoking Feel Dangerous
On Adventures as Investments
On the Quality and Not the Quantity of I...
On "Helping" People Retire
On the Morality of Correcting Mistakes
On Who We Are and Who We Want to
On the Value of Splitting Checks
On Staplers and Quarters
On Taking Time for Exercise
On Memory
On Books and Audiobooks
On Souls and Pascal's Wager
On Showing Off the Price
On Topics and Teachers
On (the Lack of) Self-Control
On Three Building Blocks of a Balancing...
On Wasting Time Deciding
On Buffet ROI
On Asking the Right Questions
On Doughnuts and the Locus of Free Will
On the Most Optimistic Day of the Year
On Emotional Investing in the Stock Ma...
On Commuting and Adaptation
On Riding Your Dryer to Tucson
On Promotions and the Illusion of Progr...
On Distance from Emotion and Caring
On Predicting Happiness
New Questions and Advice
On the Curse of Knowledge
On Bad Sex
On Mice and Markets
On Letting Loose
On Shrinking and Honesty
On High Heels
On Rules as a Way to Overcome Negati...
On Taxes and Mitzvahs
On Bull Service
On Loss Aversion and Sports Acknowledgments
21 people found this helpful
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Bradley Bevers
VINE VOICE
4.0 out of 5 stars Recommend reading other Ariely books first
Reviewed in the United States on May 20, 2015
Verified Purchase
This is a great read for Ariely fans. I wasn't aware he wrote an advice column, and this is a quick compilation of some favorites. It's an excellent read and very well done, but I can't give it five stars for a couple of reasons.

First, there is some really good advice here. For instance, pretending to tell your best friend what to do is one of the best decision making tools I have found, and Ariely points it out in just a few paragraphs. That's great . . . but its interspersed with so-so advice and comedic relief. I think that works well for a column, but its an easy book to read quickly and pass over the good stuff.

Second, I would recommend at least three of his other books before this. In my opinion, this is for Ariely fans but not for very many other people. I would recommend Predictably Irrational before this one to almost anyone.

It's good, it's priced right, it's a quick read in a short paperback - recommended for Ariely fans.
9 people found this helpful
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Ariel Rotman
3.0 out of 5 stars A little too simplistic
Reviewed in the United States on November 24, 2022
Verified Purchase
The book is not as interesting as his other books.
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andrew
4.0 out of 5 stars The information is still fantastic and Dan has a great new way to look ...
Reviewed in the United States on June 24, 2015
Verified Purchase
I am a Dan Ariely fan. I have been ever since Predictably Irrational. I was an economics major and people not acting rationally as explained and assumed in all of my courses did not make sense to me until reading these books... Somehow, though, this last book is not as engaging as his first books. The information is still fantastic and Dan has a great new way to look at things, but the way this book is put together (almost like short stories) has made it easy to put down and not come back to for long periods of time. I would suggest this as a good book for a business trip to read on the plane or with multiple layovers...
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Rob Galbraith
3.0 out of 5 stars Lighter fare and a great intro to Dan Ariely
Reviewed in the United States on June 29, 2020
Verified Purchase
I'm a big fan of Dan Ariely and have read 4 of his previous books. This book is a collection of his Ask Ariely column for the Wall Street Journal over the past few years. As such, the subject matter is quite varied and each snippet quite short. There are fewer grand lessons or concepts here. It is a great introduction to Ariely's wit and work as a social psychologist so if you are not familiar with his work, I recommend starting with either Predictably Irrational (his first and most famous book) or this one.
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H. Karaca Kestelli
3.0 out of 5 stars A book that is not a book
Reviewed in the United States on June 19, 2017
Verified Purchase
I am partly at fault why i didn't like Dan's book as i have not done sufficient research prior reading it. This is not a book. It's a collection of newspaper articles where Dan answers reader questions. It is one of the many examples of "Dear Dan....". The reader who has read Dan's "predictably irrational" will feel short-changed in this book. While one may yearn for more elaborate reasoning or explanation of one particular situation here in this book you only find a horoscope style quick and dirty answer.

While it is somewhat fun to read these (hence the three stars as opposed to one) it is not the Dan Ariely i was expecting.
6 people found this helpful
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TheWildBoy
VINE VOICE
5.0 out of 5 stars Didn't put it down once I started reading
Reviewed in the United States on February 17, 2018
Verified Purchase
The moment I started reading this book I didn't put it down until I was done. I loved Dr. Ariely's work so much that I bought his other two books and I will be reading them.

My favorite from the book was the question about diamond ring and parking.

I couldn't stop laughing. Not only the book is super entertaining but I learned a lot and I love how Dr. Dan tackles the questions and his answers are not only witty, smart, intelligent but super funny.

Great book and highly recommended. Super easy to read!
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Edoardo Angeloni
3.0 out of 5 stars Some little story about the actual time.
Reviewed in the United States on November 17, 2015
Verified Purchase
In this book Ariely confirms his intelligent intuitions which with I had understood certain events around the ideal customer of Post-modern time. He explicates so this evolution: here he talks about slogans and innovations in according to the behaviour of the globalization, in an unusual way for him respect his previous book.
In fact the polemics which we have known him in the past, now those like the stories whom happen in the news-papers.
But in fact that is a vision more interesting for the similarities with the principal mass-media than the universitary arguments, whom had a philosophical aspect.
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A J
4.0 out of 5 stars Always funny
Reviewed in the United States on May 4, 2020
Verified Purchase
He explains everything in such unexpected ways. One of my favourite authors and speakers. Online classes are great fun too.
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G-Man
5.0 out of 5 stars Dan has a way of seeing the non-obvious, explaining it simply and making it interesting.
Reviewed in the United States on October 7, 2015
Verified Purchase
Read this on a long flight to Seattle. Dan has a way of seeing the non-obvious, explaining it simply and making it interesting. Not a life changing book but I found one page that helped me decide on what car to buy. It's called "signaling". I bet most every reader will find at least one idea that makes a difference in his/her life and for that reason, I have to give it 5 stars.
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