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Customer Review

73 of 79 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Book, December 19, 2007
This review is from: How to Heal a Broken Heart in 30 Days: A Day-by-Day Guide to Saying Good-bye and Getting On With Your Life (Paperback)
This book has truly become an important part in helping me in my life.

I read this book and marked it up a whole bunch and have been going back a lot, looking at specific chapters as they pertain to me. It really has been great to read and has given me a lot of new perspectives on what I have been going through.

I am recently out a relationship in which I fell head over heels in love with a girl. We started dating and to say I was on top of the world would be an understatement. We dated for a year (talked marriage and kids) and at about that point I started getting feelings that it just was not right for me. I broke up with my girlfriend and for a long time after we went back and forth with dating each other, each time me breaking up with her.

I thought I was going to be able to move forward and move on with my life and at one point we stopped talking. About a month later she informed me she was seeing someone else and my world pretty much crashed. I was in such a bad place as I went through all those feelings of "I gave up the best thing ever," to "what is wrong with me," to "I will never love again," to "how could she be with someone else," to "why could I not love her before, this pain is unbearable," etc.

To say the last few months have been hard would be an understatement. But this book has been a big part of my life and helped me get through those sleepless nights, those unending days, and I can see now that I am now on a road to recovery. It is a process and this book has helped me see how to make it through that process.

One's first true love has been so hard to get over, especially knowing I was the one who ended it every time. I could not understand why I was saying goodbye every time to the one person I loved. All I could do was try to figure out what was wrong with me, there had to be some defect within me. Then to add to the confusion even more, after all the times I said goodbye, when I found out she was with someone else, was when I really hit rock bottom. That was when I really started to question my decisions. That is when I picked up this book and started reading.

This book takes a look at things from both sides, whether you are the one breaking up or you are the one who was broken up with. I feel like in my situation I was on both sides! I have learned so much about myself and I really have started to take a turn for the better. I have setbacks, but I have to understand that I am going to have those days and the good thing is is that those days are a lot fewer and farther between than thirty days ago.

I lost my best friend, the one person that I truly opened up to and really shared my core with. It has been hard for me knowing she is out there and close to me, yet so far away in so many respects. It has been hard having the one person that I really want to talk to about all this, not there for me. It is not everyday that we lose our best friend. It is something that I have struggled with, but I have realized it is something I have to deal with. This book shows you how to work through that.

I know I have a ways to go, but I am progessing. This book has been an amazing help to me as I have truly had the hardest time of my life. I even emailed the authors and they got back to me right away, what a great feeling!

I would recommend this book highly to those who are working on mending their heart, no matter what the situation.
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Showing 1-4 of 4 posts in this discussion
Initial post: Jul 10, 2008, 5:34:22 PM PDT
I identify so much with your story. Except add seven years (for eight years total), the tender years of 16y.o.-24y.o., and an alcoholic (him).
I left him several times over the years, this last time being for good. He cried and apologized, said he'd get better. So I mistakenly remained friends with him, hoping he'd recover. Two months later and he's already has a new girlfriend - one seven years his junior and to whom he bestowerd the title after less than two weeks. It still kills though. I left but I hadn't moved on. Not to say he's really moved on (jumping from one exclusive relationship to another is not a sign of healing) but I feel both the abandoner and abandonee.

I have to ask - do you still feel they were the love of you life?

Thank you.

Posted on Aug 17, 2008, 6:23:25 PM PDT
Gizmosears says:
Hi Dan,

This may be weird but I found your review compelling because I am in the situation your ex was in. My boyfriend broke up with me and claims he loves me (exactly like how you felt!) I've talked to him so many times and understand that everyone's situation is different. But he really didn't give me an answer. From your perspective, how does that work? How can you love someone but not want to be together with them? I am such a mess and this is the question I'm working through. Any advice would help! Thank you!

Posted on Mar 6, 2011, 4:49:35 AM PST
ms. kruger says:
I may be young but i recently ended a relationship with my boyfriend. I ended it cause of a stupid fight when i should have made up and gotten over it. he started the fight but still as he told me "people dont break up over stupid fights." guess i should have remebered that. we were going to get back together BUT this other guy came along and i was afriad that if i didnt say yes to the other guy then id be alone because i assumed...(never a good idea) that my ex wasnt going to take me back,later on my exs friend informed me that he probaly would have.....now i`m stuck trying to talk to him again......

Posted on Mar 27, 2011, 7:48:52 PM PDT
Dude133 says:
Same thing with me. I had a girlfriend for 3 years and she was completely happy while I kept on breaking it off with her. Finally I left her alone and discovered that she had a new boyfriend. It destroyed me.
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